The intense tale of exile, bittersweet love, war, bravery, sacrifice and betrayal

I figured, if you have to do stupid exercises like this, then I should too. Here is my best shot. I won't change it, except for spelling and grammar mistakes.

Exercise: Write an Intense Tale of Exile, involving bittersweet love, war, bravery, sacrifice and betrayal. Set it in the world of Snails!



I stood, with shackles around my antennas, a twisting rope through my shell.
My poor shell, cracking, soon to fall off.
I bet King Dynamo will laugh at the humiliation of me being a slug. A slug, like a commoner, When I was supposed to stand in his shoes, and be King Snivellus II, and win the war. Nelly stands out like a beacon in the crowd, her antennas pulled in enough for the both of us. She has no shell. I remember stealing from the vegetable patch with her only three days ago, her laughter and mine. We stayed there so long our trails disappeared in the sun light. I loved Nelly. I couldn't tell anyone else about our love. Nothing good would come out of it.
The sweet tide lapped against my foot as I was pulled in. I prayed I wouldn't die of hunger. I could breath alright under water, but only for a few days. Some time I would have to come up for air.
I felt the ropes loosen slightly as I got further into the water, my shell fully covered. I knew I was in the shark pool. The shark pool. Shark pool. I kept sliding forwards. No one was holding on to the ropes anymore.
I saw a flash of colour wiz past me, and I froze solid, although it was hard slowing down from such a fast speed.
I wanted to go down there. The only hard part was getting down. I pulled the spiky spear out from inside my shell with great difficulty, and help it ready.
If only Rocket, Lord of the jagged rocks hadn't betrayed me. He thought he would have had the throne. He was wrong. At least now he was Duke of the Coral Reefs, as I was once. Maybe he might trial Dynamo and  become King Rocket XI, King of the Shore line and Emperor of the Rock Pools, and at least he would be better than King Dynamo III. No doubt about it.
The Shark fish's Jaws came towards me. I lunged inside, feeling the heat of 1000 pools dug up from under the sand. I could feet myself being dried up as I slid down the crab-red insides of the fish. Then I remembered the spear. With my last breath, I shoved it through the fishes back, and felt it dieing around me.
My people were safe from the evil being.